Considering running away together? If you're reading this, the answer is almost certainly "yes!"
Although eloping is fantastic, it is not for everyone. The "just us" atmosphere may be ideal for certain couples, while a rowdy reception may appeal to others.
If you and your significant other are contemplating of eloping, here are some pros, downsides, and other things to think about.
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With any luck, the items on this list will help you plan an ideal day!
Exactly What Does It Imply When People Elope?
To put it plainly, eloping is a way to get married with less fanfare and in more secrecy than in a traditional ceremony.
There was a time when a "running wedding" meant leaving behind friends and relatives, but this is not always the situation now.
This is attributable, in part, to more liberal attitudes towards eloping.
Eloping has gained social acceptance because it is the best option for certain couples. Elopements are typically more affordable, simpler, and less stressful than traditional weddings, not to mention more personal.
Then why do people elope? Any number of scenarios are possible for a couple that decides to elope. One option is to have a small ceremony during lunch on a Tuesday; another is to elope and celebrate your marriage far away from friends and family.
In addition, you may like to have just very close friends and family members present at the exchanging of vows.
In the end, you'll be able to say your vows and start your married life much sooner, with much less hassle and expense.
In What Ways Does Eloping Differ From Marriage?
Let's start with the basics and determine what we mean when we talk about the advantages and cons of eloping.
Eloping used to indicate a wedding that was hastily planned and carried out with no one but the bride and groom present, but now it often refers to a wedding that is smaller in scale and more informal in nature.
Is It Acceptable to Get Married After Eloping?
Yes! To begin, you can legally wed, elope, or become legally married in any way you see fit.
Having a wedding after an elopement, however, can be a great idea for a number of reasons.
Due to the pandemic, several engaged couples had to postpone their 2020 weddings until 2021 or 2022, or some decided for a quickie elopement instead.
This way, they won't have to sacrifice their first date in order to have a big party with all their loved ones afterwards.
If you and your future husband have different ideas about the magnitude of your wedding and you both want to get married quickly, eloping is one possibility.
Elope with your introverted lover one day and plan a big wedding for your extroverted self (or vice versa) the next!
As a pair, you should do what seems right for you.
If a couple wants to get married quickly but doesn't have the resources for their dream wedding ceremony, they can always elect to have an elopement and a larger wedding at a later date.
Forget about the big wedding for now, and just elope on the cheap!
In short, the answer is yes, for whatever reason some couples may decide to do both.
Factors That Influence a Couple’s Decision to Elope
A nontraditional wedding and reception can be rejected for more than one reason. Perhaps a combination of the following factors is at play:
You Probably Don’t Like to Waste an Unreasonable Amount of Money
If money is tight or you'd rather put that kind of money into investments, a wedding could appear to be a waste of money.
It’s Important to You to Have a Wonderful Time on the Wedding
The wedding day is a result of months of preparation and planning and it's easy to get carried away by all the events that take place.
For this reason, it's possible that you won't always be fully present.
You Feel Uneasy When People Pay You Close Attention
If the bride and groom are not used to become the centre of attention, planning a wedding for dozens or even hundreds of guests can be a source of stress.
You're Too Preoccupied
An elopement could be the ideal option if you are both extremely busy and cannot plan a traditional wedding ceremony and reception.
You’d Rather Stay Away From Family Conflict
Maybe one of you is having trouble mending fences with their relatives, or maybe you've got your own problems to work through. Either way, an intimate elopement ceremony might help you avoid unnecessary drama.
To restate, escaping is never a terrible idea. As long as you and your intended are content, there is no right way to get married.
Pros of Eloping
Your Wedding Day Can Be Organised Anyway You Choose
If you'd rather not have anyone telling you how or when you should have your wedding, an elopement can help you avoid that.
You get to pick the time, place, attire, and menu, all without having to consider anyone else's wants or desires.
You should be at the centre of all attention and deliberation on this special day.
Logistical Tasks Will Take Up Less Of Your Time
You won't have to use another weekend travelling to attend a bridal show, meet with potential service providers, or check out potential locations.
Your email, too, will be a peaceful haven of contentment. Planning an event for a big number of people requires a dedicated staff to conduct extensive research, make several phone calls, send numerous emails, create mood boards, prepare briefs, and sign numerous contracts.
Time-crunched people would find this a welcome reprieve.
There’s No Stage or Spotlight
An elopement provides the opportunity for a more private ceremony, which can lead to deeper feelings of love and connection.
Those who are meant to hear each other's private conversations don't broadcast them to an audience.
You won't feel any pressure to censor yourself or keep your emotions in check just because an audience is watching.
In addition, the stress of coordinating a huge wedding party won't be as great of an issue.
You Can Ditch the Strict Timeline
Since the timeline for an elopement is typically somewhat loose, you will have more time to enjoy each moment without having to worry about the day rushing by too quickly.
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A Greater Amount of Time Will Be Spent Together
An elopement does not have the same level of hosting responsibilities as a traditional wedding.
You and your date won't have to waste time looking for one other as you scatter from table to table; instead, you can take pleasure in every part of the day you've organised together.
The Wedding Ceremony can Take Place Anywhere
Consider majestic clifftops, snowy landscapes, and secluded beaches as possible locations for your elopement.
These picturesque locales, which may have been out of reach with guests in tow, are now within reach.
You’ll Get Your Very Own Private Photo Shoot
You'll have more time to travel to far-flung locales in search of breathtaking photo and film opportunities.
They'll be much simpler to get to without the wedding party, and you'll be able to focus on your new spouse for longer without having to constantly dodge the eyes of your friends and family.
In addition, you won't have to worry about being late to greet your visitors.
It’s Cheaper in Expenses
The per-person costs of a wedding will go down significantly if you invite only a limited number of people.
Including certain opulent upgrades, you should still come out ahead financially.
Your Entire Experience Can Be Tailored to Your Specific Needs
Here's your time to share the things that are most important to the two of you, whether they're funny inside jokes or offbeat anecdotes.
The standard wedding, which emerged as a practical solution to accommodating a large number of guests, is out.
Cons of Eloping
It Is Still Important to Create a Budget
To be sure, figuring out your preferences and available cash is essential for both a smaller wedding and an elopement.
While eloping may appear to save money at first, spending all that extra cash on unnecessary extras can quickly drive up the total price.
Constraints on Optionality
Your ideal wedding date, venue, or vendor may be off-limits if you can't fulfil their minimum purchase or guest criteria.
It's possible that you'll have to shift your focus and examine new facets of the day.
Your Preparations Might Fail
Your story begins with you and your witnesses on a tropical island.
Very quickly, you'll be bringing your entire wedding party along to your chosen location, turning it into a destination wedding, and so reintroducing the very complications and costs you were hoping to avoid.
Anyone who elopes in hopes of avoiding the wedding planning process may be disappointed if they find themselves right back where they started.
Your Wedding Will Have Less Spectacle
While the lack of a kitchen tea (what is that?) may come as a relief, the lack of hens and bucks parties, which is not uncommon for elopements, may be met with mixed emotions.
Your friends and family won't have as much time to participate in the preparations or share in the fun of the rituals that help build anticipation of the wedding.
It’s Common for Loved Ones to Feel Left Out
If your loved ones are questioning your decision to elope, they could ruin an otherwise happy occasion.
Sadness and grief at the thought that they won't be part of your day is natural, as is disappointment that your hopes and dreams won't come true.
These replies, some of which may be harsh or appear irrational, yet require a response.
You Can Expect Some Difficult Questions
Even if your celebration is somewhat unimportant, you can expect to be peppered with inquisitive inquiries.
Just when did you make the choice to elope? Can I still come if I hurry? When, if at all, are we supposed to arrive at the reception?
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Some of these questions may seem more personal and demanding of your time than you bargained for.
Sometimes the Good Times Just Don’t Last
You can take your time getting dressed in the morning, have a small ceremony, enjoy some champagne and cake, and take some beautiful pictures.
There's a chance the day won't live up to expectations if you don't have anything set up to keep the party going after the actual holiday ends. A fantastic occasion for one person may be a non-event for another.
Not Everyone Will Be There
There is a possibility that you won't see some people who were present at previous milestone occasions in your life.
If you choose to elope, your friends and family won't be able to participate in the festivities or celebrate with you, leaving them to relive the day only through photographs and videos.
It’s Natural to Wonder “What If?”
It's natural to fantasise about what a grander ceremony might have been like if you opted for a more modest celebration to celebrate a momentous occasion.
We trust that whichever choice you choose will turn out to be the best one for you at the time.
However, if you're worried about losing out, you might be disappointed by the outcome of your elopement.
As a Result, It’s Not as Significant
Even if a couple has known since before they got engaged that a lavish wedding isn't their thing, they may still face occasional pangs of regret.
For those who live in a culture where weddings play a significant role, the decision to forego the traditional wedding in favour of something smaller may cause feelings of regret or isolation.
It's natural to feel torn, even if eloping is the path you know you'd prefer to take.
Keep in mind that not all couples are suited for traditional weddings and that's acceptable.
Spending a day with your best friend celebrating your love and commitment to one another is what your wedding is all about. Only such kind of training is useful.
Whether or not an elopement is a suitable fit for your priorities will depend on how much weight you give each of these advantages and negatives.
We hope your wedding day is everything you've imagined and more, whatever you decide to do.
Considerations Prior to an Elopement
Here are some questions to ask your potential elopement partner to ensure that you're both on the same page if you decide to go through with this option.
What Is It That You Two Want?
Have a lengthy discussion about your goals and expectations before looking for a location or deciding on a date.
Of course not everyone wishes for a grand nuptial celebration. Perhaps you're not the extroverted sort, or perhaps the notion of selecting party invitees leaves you exhausted.
Eloping can sound intriguing if the couple value privacy and spontaneity in your relationship.
Put your friends' and family's advice, wedding publications, and social media into a separate box while making your own decisions as partners.
The location of the ceremony is entirely up to the happy couple; options include an intimate sundown ceremony on a beach, a public ceremony on city hall this weekend, a public wedding in the park where the couple first met, or a celebration in the privacy of their own backyard.
How Much Can You Spend?
It's possible that the wedding you've always imagined is just too expensive to pull together.
An elopement will save you money on your wedding because you won't have to feed and water dozens or hundreds of guests.
Getting married in a civil wedding is the most cost-effective option; all you need is to apply for and pay for a marriage licence.
Who Among You, If Any, Could Ever Regret Eloping?
It's possible that you and your future spouse both like more formal attire for the wedding than is actually being worn.
There may be some family members you'd like to invite to the wedding that your future spouse doesn't share your enthusiasm for.
Your history together will be different from that of any other couple.
Thus, while broaching the subject of eloping, it is important to express any doubts you may have and to take into account your partner's worries.
To honestly assess whether or not they would be unhappy or regretful if they eloped, the couple must have a thorough understanding of one other.
If one of you is on the fence about eloping, you should wait until you've made up your mind. But if you don't, you or them may come to feel remorse or anger.
Techniques for a Private Wedding
While less planning is necessary for an elopement than a full-blown wedding, a few things will still need to be taken care of.
For those who have decided to elope, here is a primer on the fundamentals:
Select a Venue
Your wedding ceremony might be as low-key as saying your vows at the local courthouse, or as elaborate as planning a trip to a remote vineyard and resort.
Make a Decision on the Specifics of the Wedding
Do you feel like putting on a little makeup and a nice outfit? About how big would you like the flower arrangements to be?
Hire a Photographer
Even if you don't have many people around to witness your nuptials, you should still hire a professional photographer.
Estimate the Cost
Determine the cost of being married in your selected venue, including the cost of a marriage certificate and any other ceremony fees. It is important to look at travel expenses, such as flights and lodging, if you are planning a trip.
Savor Every Second of Your Wedding Day
Without outsiders or the last disasters in event planning, you and your significant other can concentrate on each other and the importance of the day.
Inform Those You Care About
It can be helpful to figure out how and when you will break the news of your upcoming marriage to your loved ones.
Is Eloping a Good Idea?
Then what is the final verdict on running away together? As always, it all depends on the context. After weighing the benefits and drawbacks of eloping, the consensus is that no two couples will ever have the same wedding.
A small elopement may be welcomed by some, but others might not approve. The only thing that matters to us is that you have the wedding day of your dreams, and we will do everything we can to make that happen for you.
Your call on whether or not that constitutes an elopement.
Conclusion
Because eloping is the best option for some couples, it has earned social support. When compared to a regular wedding, an elopement is often less expensive, less complicated, and less stressful. An official wedding ceremony following an elopement is sometimes recommended. Put off planning a lavish wedding for now and instead elope. If you and your future spouse have very full schedules, eloping can be the best alternative.
There is no wrong way to get married so long as the couple is happy with their decision. Because there is no spotlight or audience, you may take in each moment as a couple. The pressure of organising a large wedding guest list won't be as severe. If you invite a small number of individuals, you can drastically reduce your expenses. You can count on being asked a lot of nosy questions.
When it comes to experiences, what one person considers to be a spectacular event may be a bore for someone else. If you don't have plans to keep the celebration going after the holiday is over, the day could not live up to your expectations. If you and your partner like to keep your relationship low-key and open, eloping could sound like a fun option to explore. As you won't have to provide refreshments for dozens, if not hundreds, of guests, an elopement can help you save money on your wedding. For those looking to save money on their wedding, a civil ceremony is the best bet.
FAQs About Elopements
In a nutshell: YES, eloping is perfectly OK. However, this isn't always a walk in the park. As long as the couple follows the laws of the state or nation they choose to get married in, an elopement is perfectly valid.
Guests. This is arguably the most striking difference between a standard wedding and an elopement. The average number of attendees at a wedding is between fifty and two hundred, while the average number of people in an elopement is twenty. There are 20-50 people at a "microwedding."
Elopements are more affordable and give the couple more time to enjoy their honeymoon. As an added bonus, rather than inviting 300 people as would be the case at a typical wedding, these events are more smaller and more private.
Because of the smaller number of guests, a "micro wedding" can be a condensed version of a typical wedding and reception. A typical micro wedding has a ceremony that lasts only ten to fifteen minutes, followed by a cocktail hour (2 hours more or less).
Without a doubt! You can certainly bring some friends along and still call it an elopement, whether your state requires witnesses or you just want a few close friends or family members present to be a part of the event.
Content Summary
- If you and your significant other are contemplating eloping, here are some pros, downsides, and other things to think about.
- Any number of scenarios are possible for a couple that decides to elope.
- Let's start with the basics and determine what we mean when we talk about the advantages and cons of eloping.
- If you and your future husband have different ideas about the magnitude of your wedding and you both want to get married quickly, eloping is one possibility.
- If a couple wants to get married quickly but doesn't have the resources for their dream wedding ceremony, they can always elect to have an elopement and a larger wedding at a later date.
- Forget about the big wedding for now, and just elope on the cheap!In short, the answer is yes, for whatever reason some couples may decide to do both.
- An elopement could be the ideal option if you are both extremely busy and cannot plan a traditional wedding ceremony and reception.
- Either way, an intimate elopement ceremony might help you avoid unnecessary drama.
- If you'd rather not have anyone telling you how or when you should have your wedding, an elopement can help you avoid that.
- You get to pick the time, place, attire, and menu, all without having to consider anyone else's wants or desires.
- An elopement provides the opportunity for a more private ceremony, which can lead to deeper feelings of love and connection.
- Since the timeline for an elopement is typically somewhat loose, you will have more time to enjoy each moment without having to worry about the day rushing by too quickly.
- They'll be much simpler to get to without the wedding party, and you'll be able to focus on your new spouse for longer without having to constantly dodge the eyes of your friends and family.
- The per-person costs of a wedding will go down significantly if you invite only a limited number of people.
- Very quickly, you'll be bringing your entire wedding party along to your chosen location, turning it into a destination wedding, and so reintroducing the very complications and costs you were hoping to avoid.
- Your friends and family won't have as much time to participate in the preparations or share in the fun of the rituals that help build anticipation of the wedding.
- If you choose to elope, your friends and family won't be able to participate in the festivities or celebrate with you, leaving them to relive the day only through photographs and videos.
- However, if you're worried about losing out, you might be disappointed by the outcome of your elopement.
- Here are some questions to ask your potential elopement partner to ensure that you're both on the same page if you decide to go through with this option.
- Have a lengthy discussion about your goals and expectations before looking for a location or deciding on a date.
- Getting married in a civil wedding is the most cost-effective option; all you need is to apply for and pay for a marriage licence.