How Do You Choose Bridesmaids and Groomsmen?

Picking the Right Attendants for Your Wedding

If you want your wedding party to be remembered forever, we offer some important advice on how to select your bridesmaids and groomsmen.

Consider the Size of Your Wedding.

Don't misunderstand us; the number of attendants in your wedding party is completely up to you.

However, the traditional number of bridesmaids and groomsmen is five each, so keep that in mind as a starting point while making your own plans.

Larger or smaller sizes are appropriate for different levels of formality. Keep the wedding party size to a maximum of four if you're having less than 50 or 60 guests, and up to 12 if you're having more than 150. Just remember that quantity does not necessarily imply quality.

There are a lot more moving parts to coordinate when you have 12 people in your wedding party instead of just two. There are tuxedos and outfits to find, a bachelor or bachelorette party to plan around everyone's schedules, and wedding party gifts to buy.

Start Your Siblings

There are many who could view it as little more than a ritual. But if you're worried about making someone feel left out in the process of choosing bridesmaids, it's probably a good idea to ask certain relatives to be in your wedding party.

As they have known you the longest, they are more likely to be constant companions throughout your life.

Some of the most significant people in your life are likely members of your family, and the bond between you and them only grows stronger with time. Choose those closest to you or stop the celebration at the teen years if your family is large.

If you don't have any pals to ask, your siblings and other relatives make excellent bridesmaids.

It's a great idea to start the process of selecting your wedding party with your siblings.

If they're considerably younger than you, you might consider having them act as ushers or junior attendants, but if they're about your age or older, they deserve the entire honour.

Likewise, a bride is free to choose her brother as a bridesman and a groom is free to choose his sister as his lady.

Consider Your Relationship With That Person

If you're having problems choosing your bridal party, you could want to think about your long-term plans with each person.

Think about your life in five, ten, or twenty years from now when debating who to invite to the party.

Will you continue to have contact with them? What would you do if you didn't have them? In that case, you should feel free to invite them to your anniversaries.

Guests at your wedding shouldn't be chosen based on how long you've known them or how close you are to them.

You don't want to have regrets when you look back at your wedding photos and wonder why you put them in a position of honour among you and your loved ones.

Size Matters When it Comes to the Wedding Party

The traditional number of bridesmaids and groomsmen in a bridal party is four.

Nowadays, the number of attendants in both the bridal party and the groom's party is completely up to the couple getting married.

However, you should think about how many people will be attending the wedding and how big of a party you want to throw. If you're planning a wedding with less than 60 people, the wedding party might be too large of a proportion of the attendees to invite. We have created the ultimate list of Hens Party Ideas for you and the girls to create a day and night she’ll never forget.

Pick as many bridesmaids and groomsmen as you like if your wedding has over a hundred guests.

Please make Sure They're Ready for the Responsibility

Being a groomsman or bridesmaid comes with varying levels of responsibilities, depending on the couple.

Perhaps the only responsibility you give them is to plan the bachelor and bachelorette parties before the wedding.

Wedding attendants are traditionally responsible for assisting the bride and groom with the invitation process, selecting wedding attire, and coordinating the day-of events. It's also important to put some thought into selecting a maid of honour and best man.

Some of the most crucial duties, such as holding the rings and calming the bride and groom if they're feeling nervous, are usually assigned to these individuals.

You don't have to stress out about these details if you don't want your bridesmaids and groomsmen to have a major role in the wedding.

However, if they have duties, it's best to choose someone trustworthy who can be relied upon to carry them out.

Look for someone you can entrust with the amount of responsibility the job calls for.

Don't Ask Someone Just Because They Asked You.

Awkward situations can arise, for example, when you feel forced to invite someone to your wedding but know they aren't someone you want there.

The usual reason is that you were a wedding party member, either as a bridesmaid or groomsman.

You should think about how much they mean to you and whether they are truly likely to become an integral part of your family life in the future.

Even if it causes you some humiliation, it's better to have only the people you consider to be your closest friends and family in your wedding party.

Think Twice Before You Ask.

You cannot retract an invitation to a member of your wedding party once it has been extended.

You shouldn't rush out and invite your closest friends to be in your wedding party the second you get engaged, no matter how tempting it may be. Don't rush anything.

I recommend giving yourself at least a month to consider your alternatives. Then you need to ask yourself, "Will I still feel the same way about this person in five years as I do now?"

Don't Feel Stuck by Gender Norms.

There are many males who are closer to their female best friends or sisters than to any of their male friends.

The same holds true for female relationships with male relatives and acquaintances. Your wedding party need not be composed of equal numbers of male and female guests.

A best man can be a buddy or a brother, or anyone else you choose.

One of the bridesmaids could wear a dress to coordinate with the groom's suit in instead of the traditional black tie attire.

Downsize If You Want to Avoid Hurt Feelings

It's not easy to pick just three "best friends" to be bridesmaids out of a group of ten people you consider close friends.

Reduce the number of potential triggers and make a tough decision easy on yourself.

When asked to choose the four most important individuals in their lives, it may be easier to choose just three. Looking for a Wedding Event Planner? Look no further, Cosmopolitan events have you covered.

Remember There Aren't Rules

It's fair to dub him the man of honour and her the best woman around. Both men and women are welcome to stand besides the bride or the groom as they see fit.

Gender is irrelevant; what matters is that you invite your favourite individuals.

They can be dressed anyway you like; there are no strict guidelines. Groomsmen can wear tuxedos, dresses, or even rompers; bridesmen can mimic the groomsmen's attire, or wear suits that complement the bridesmaids' dresses.

Make sure they feel well in the clothes you choose out for them.

Choose Responsible Honor Attendants.

The ideal maids of honour are reliable friends who can be trusted with important responsibilities during the wedding planning process, such as safeguarding the bride and groom's wedding bands.

And because they'll be organising the bachelor and bachelorette parties, it's great if they're also a tonne of fun.

Consider having two best men or maids of honour if your best buddy isn't the most reliable person in your life.

Choose an unreliable best friend and a reliable pal to share the heavy lifting.

Don't Ask Someone Just Because They Asked You.

A wedding is not the place for giving or demanding favours. Just because someone asked you to be a part of their wedding is no reason to ask them to be a part of yours.

Don't expect a favour to be returned from a college roommate you haven't spoken to in five years.

If they ask you why they aren't invited to the wedding, you should tell them the truth.

You should have the people you feel closest to at this moment in your life standing up for you, and there are so many of those people including him or her that you had to leave out some excellent ones, you say.

Research Other Roles.

Guests will need to be escorted to their seats, candles lit, and programmes handed out, so you may want to hire some ushers to help with this.

However, there are other alternative possibilities to consider. Maybe you have a musically minded buddy who would love to play something at the reception.

Or how about your best friend who happens to be a published author? Solicit a poem or an essay of significance to be read at the ceremony from your guest of honour.

It's probably not a good idea to offer your pals low-level jobs like "guest book attendant" because not everyone needs one. Is that something you wish to do? )

A VIP corsage and a front row seat at the ceremony would make most people happy. Here is a full rundown of what more the wedding party can do to help out.

Kids Aren't Required.

You don't need a flower girl or ring bearer if neither of you has any very close children. Additionally, feel free to invite as many kids as you like.

Boys may like the activity of throwing flower petals just as much as girls, so why not have three little flower girls instead of one and give each one a basket full?

Consider having your two young children serve as pages and go down the aisle. They can serve as ring bearers, token bearers, or "Here Comes the Bride" sign bearers.

To what extent will children be excluded from the ceremony? While children shouldn't be invited to the reception, they can still take part in the ceremony in their appropriate roles.

If that's the case, make sure there's some kind of kid-friendly entertainment and refreshments available at the reception and maybe even a separate area set up with a babysitter.

Set Honest Expectations.

In what ways do you hope your wedding party will help you celebrate?

To what extent do you need their assistance with things like wedding invitation addressing, wedding day outfit shopping, and other pre-wedding events?

Or do they just need to show up on your wedding day dressed in whatever you decide they should?

Inviting distant relatives or those who are already overbooked could be a bad choice if you want your wedding party to be really hands-on. It's possible you're just asking to be let down.

Friends who can't attend the wedding because of distance or other commitments can still participate in some of the planning by attending a wine and pizza party where the invitations are distributed.

Be Mindful of Budget

Everyone knows that the cost of being a wedding guest can add up quickly.

The cost of flights, presents, and bachelor/bachelorette parties can quickly mount up, even if you're covering their lodging or contributing to the suit/dress.

Before making an official request, it's best to pick up the phone and have a conversation with a buddy who you know is struggling financially.

Tell them how much you appreciate their being a part of your big day, but that if they can't afford to be in the wedding party, there are other ways they may contribute.

In addition to readings and toasts at the rehearsal dinner and ceremony, close friends can also serve as ushers and distribute programmes.

Think About Feelings

The easiest way to avoid bruised feelings is to have fewer bridesmaids or groomsmen.

It may be easier to decide who makes the cut if you have a smaller bridal party, such as simply your sister and your childhood best friend, rather than a larger group, such as two or three buddy groups and ten or more'maids.

However, if you're set on having a large wedding party and only one buddy is on the fence about attending, it may be best to invite them all.

Avoid Inter-Party Feuds

Finally, it's important to think about how the bridesmaids and groomsmen's unique personalities will mesh.

You'll be hanging out with these people rather frequently. You may want to rethink inviting folks who despise each other if doing so will increase your stress levels.

Your bridal party members need not be BFFs. But let's say there's one person who is extremely rude or critical and poses a significant threat of conflict. Looking for the ultimate Bucks Party Ideas? Check out our list of ultimate bucks ideas.

If that's the case, maybe a reading is the best way to incorporate them into the festivities.

Exactly What Does a Bridal Party Consist Of?

Bridal party members are those who support the bride and groom during wedding preparations and the big day itself.

It is customary for the maid of honour, best man, bridesmaids, and groomsmen to form this group.

The maid of honour, or "chief" of the bridesmaids, traditionally performs a pivotal role in the wedding and is the only member of the bridal party who is not married.

If the person you had in mind to be your maid of honour is already married, it doesn't mean she can't be a part of your big day or fulfil the same duties that a maid of honour would.

The only distinction is that she is called the matron of honour instead of the maid of honour. A bride's maid of honour is typically a sibling or close friend.

Modern brides often have multiple maids of honour, despite the fact that tradition calls for only one.

The bridesmaids, along with the maid of honour and matron of honour, make up the ladies' team and are responsible for providing assistance to the bride on her wedding day.

They are typically the bride's closest friends; some brides even pick out a select handful from within their many buddy groupings, such as their high school and college crews.

The male wedding party consists of the best man and groomsmen. The best man is the de facto leader of the groomsmen and is typically the closest male related to the groom.

The best man is typically assisted by the groomsmen as he sees to the needs of the groom. Groomsmen are typically the groom's brothers or close buddies.

It is important to remember that no matter what their official tasks are, all members of the bridal party should be there for the bride and groom emotionally and psychologically throughout the entire wedding process. You, as the future Mrs., know better than anyone how taxing it can be to organise a wedding.

Therefore, it means the world to you anytime your bridesmaids lend you a listening ear, comfort you in times of stress, help you calm your nerves before the big day, and stand by your side throughout the entire process.

Of course, you should always be a wonderful bride to your bridesmaids and show your gratitude for everything they've done for you.

Conclusion

Picking your attendants for the wedding is no simple task. There are a lot of factors to think about, including how long you've been friends and well they know your fiance. Your siblings or other close relatives are wonderful options for bridesmaids if you don't have any friends to ask. The customary number of attendants for both the bride and groom is four. Both the bride and the groom are free to select a sibling to serve in the respective roles of bridesman and lady.

The duties of a groomsman might range from little to substantial, depending on the wishes of the bride and groom. The bridesmaids and groomsmen are crucial members of the wedding party. Pick someone reliable who can be counted on to carry out their responsibilities. It's not polite to invite someone to be in your wedding just because you were asked to be in theirs. Anyone, male or female, may take their place besides the couple as they think fit during the ceremony.

The groomsmen can dress in tuxes, skirts, or even rompers, and the bridesmen can dress similarly. The best maids of honour are trustworthy besties who can be entrusted with a variety of duties. Ask members of your wedding party to assist you in finding a flower girl, ring bearer, page, or sign-bearer. Young children can play important roles in weddings as ring bearers, token bearers, or "Here Comes the Bride" sign carriers. Even if they can't attend the wedding, your friends can still help you prepare for it.

Those in the bridal party are there to help the bride and groom in any way they can before, during, and after the wedding. The maid of honour, or "chief" of the bridesmaids, is the sole single member of the Bridal Party and plays a significant part in the ceremony. Traditionally, the maid of honour is a sister or a very trusted companion of the bride. The best man and groomsmen are the male members of the wedding party. Many brides choose their grooms from among their many friend groups, including those from high school and college.

Content Summary

• It's not an easy undertaking to decide who to ask to be your bridesmaids and groomsmen.
• Although the bride and groom are the focal point of the wedding, having your closest friends around to help you celebrate and look forward to the big day is half the pleasure.
• If you want your wedding party to be remembered forever, we offer some important advice on how to select your bridesmaids and groomsmen.
• Don't misunderstand us; the number of attendants in your wedding party is completely up to you.
• Choose those closest to you or stop the celebration at the teen years if your family is large.
• If you're having problems choosing your bridal party, you could want to think about your long-term plans with each person.
• Think about your life in five, ten, or twenty years from now when debating who to invite to the party.
• Nowadays, the number of attendants in both the bridal party and the groom's party is completely up to the couple getting married.
• However, you should think about how many people will be attending the wedding and how big of a party you want to throw.
• Pick as many bridesmaids and groomsmen as you like if your wedding has over a hundred guests.
• Look for someone you can entrust with the amount of responsibility the job calls for.
• Even if it causes you some humiliation, it's better to have only the people you consider to be your closest friends and family at your wedding party.
• A best man can be a buddy or a brother, or anyone else you choose.
• Consider having two best men or maids of honour if your best buddy isn't the most reliable person in your life.
• Choose an unreliable best friend and a reliable pal to share the heavy lifting.
• You don't need a flower girl or ring bearer if neither of you has any very close children.
• Additionally, feel free to invite as many kids as you like.
• While children shouldn't be invited to the reception, they can still take part in the ceremony in their appropriate roles.
• Everyone knows that the cost of being a wedding guest can add up quickly.
• It's important to think about how the bridesmaids and groomsmen's unique personalities will mesh.
• Your bridal party members need not be BFFs.
• It is customary for the maid of honour, best man, bridesmaids, and groomsmen to form this group.
• The maid of honour, or "chief" of the bridesmaids, traditionally performs a pivotal role in the wedding and is the only member of the bridal party who is not married.
• A bride's maid of honour is typically a sibling or close friend.
• The bridesmaids, along with the maid of honour and matron of honour, make up the ladies' team and are responsible for providing assistance to the bride on her wedding day.
• The male wedding party consists of the best man and groomsmen.
• It is important to remember that no matter what their official tasks are, all members of the bridal party should be there for the bride and groom emotionally and psychologically throughout the entire wedding process.